An Open Letter To Megyn Kelly

Oh, Megyn Kelly. You're trying so hard. And you say such terrible things and then have a huge segment the next day about why what you said was bad. And while you frustrate me, I weirdly find myself wanting to give you a hug. You were too radical for Fox News and now too narrow-minded for the rest of the world. You're struggling to figure out your place in today's media. And I appreciate your struggle. I was there, once. I was narrow-minded, but not enough for the community around me. I was open-minded, but not open-minded enough for the world outside of that little community. It took years of struggling, debating, and educating myself with every possible thing I could find to read or listen to in order to figure out how to think for myself and what exactly I believed to be true. I believe you to be an intelligent, interesting, compassionate person who wants to do the best you can in your job. And you're fighting an uphill battle. Against the community you used to represent and the community you want to be a part of and also, most importantly, against yourself.
After your recent horrible comments about fat-shaming, I was shocked. But so sad for you. Because here you were, exposing your weaknesses to the world in an off-handed way with a chuckle. All I could think was how horrible your childhood must have been to warp your thoughts on weight so thoroughly. And then today, in a carefully written and passionately given monologue, you told the world that yes, your views on these things are painfully warped by horrible experiences growing up. And I understand. I used to say terrible things to mask how hurt I had been. Things like, "All you have to do is exercise," when in reality, I was terrified of my changing body and wounded by constant "moo" sounds in the hallway when I passed by. People who were gay were wrong and gross, until I actually met someone who was and became good friends with them. And they weren't gross and wrong. And slowly, my world views began to change. 
For me, these changes happened my senior year of high school and continued through my college years. And I'm also still a work in progress. I like to think of myself as an open and loving person. But I know I'm not done and I continue to ask humbly for education from people who are closer to issues I am unsure about. And because I've been there, I try to be patient when confronted with people who are speaking from places of hurt or ignorance or internalized nastiness. Which is why I cannot just write you off.
It's terrifying to realize that your views and thoughts might be wrong. I keep using terrifying and terrible because it is. Because you realize how much you've missed and how many you might have accidentally hurt with your words.
I wish you the best, Megyn Kelly. Your journey is your own and I hope you keep doing the hard work of reflection and change.

An Open Letter To Men Who Have Daughters Yet Are Against Feminism

We will return to our regularly-scheduled cute posts later because I am furious right now.

To the men who have daughters yet "like," "post," and "share" nasty posts about the Women's March and Feminism on social media:

You have daughters! You have little girls that you say can do anything, yet openly degrade the women who are fighting to keep your daughters' lives open to every possibility? You want to give them the world, yet you are okay with keeping our country forty-fifth in equality? You're okay with the government deciding what your daughters do with their bodies? You're okay with your sweet baby girls being told that what they contribute to men physically and aesthetically is more important than what is in their brains and their hearts? You promote your daughters continuing to only have makeup, dolls, and clothes in their pink aisles while the boys get science kits and cars? (Nothing against makeup, dolls, and clothes. I love all those things and had a massive collection growing up. But you better believe I also played with my brother's slimy bug maker. And if a girl really does want to only play with dolls, more power to her. It is about there being a choice that each child makes and about them having that choice.) If, God forbid, your daughters fall on hard times and need gynecological services, you're okay with defunding the one place that would have provided them with those services within their price range? On a personal note, I have been on birth control for chronic women's issues since I was twelve and have had so many issues finding the right birth control for my body. I had no idea Planned Parenthood would have helped me with my birth control issues as all I ever heard about them was people screaming about abortions. Because of this, when I fell on hard times, I put off going to a doctor and let the pill I was on cause irreparable damage to my body. Had I known I could have gone to PP for help, you better believe I would have. If your kick-ass daughters fight their way to becoming CEOs, you're okay with them being paid less than a man would be paid to do the same damn job? If your daughters and their partners decide that your daughters will be the "bread winners" in the family, you want them to be subject to ridicule and scorn and questioned as to their family loyalty every single day? If your babies come home crying because a boy hit them and the boy was not punished, you're going to be okay with that? If your precious girls come home sobbing because someone touched them against their will, are you going to ask what they were wearing before pulling them into a hug? Do you want your daughters to not be able to walk at night? Do you want your sweet girls to be told to sit down and shut up and be happy with the way things are, or do you want them to stand up, fight back, and find their voices? What exactly is the takeaway from this? What message are you trying to send to your girls? I'm so confused. And angry.

The women you are demonizing are fighting for your daughters. They are fighting for your sweet babies. And they are fighting hard. They want to make absolutely certain that our country does not backslide and that it continues to move forward. The work is not done. If you think it is, look up statistics. America is not number one. There is no equality yet. We are trying. We are fighting. Fight with us, or be prepared to explain to your girls why you think they should be happy to be second-class citizens.

Sincerely,
Feminist and Not Ashamed

(Little note: Men with any gender child sharing these misogynist posts infuriates me, but I wanted to address this particular group.)